Thursday, October 31, 2013

Ten Points to Ponder (and Ten Things I Love) About Einstein

Einstein didn't wear socks. When he was young, he found out that the big toe always ended up making a hole in the sock. He was keenly aware that we are easily conditioned by what others do and say and he refused to let that happen. When he learned that his big toe always made a hole in his socks, he stopped wearing them.

Einstein used intuition to help him discover new things. He often felt he was right before he knew he was right. When he had a feeling about something, he listened to the feeling. Then he went looking for evidence to prove the feeling.

Einstein had a thinking chair. He spent time sitting in it when he needed to solve a problem.

Einstein rarely thought in words. He understood the power of imagination so he would daydream and use his imagination when he needed to solve a problem. When a thought or idea floated in, he'd feel it or see it and then try to express it in words afterward.

Einstein did not believe he possessed any special talents. He said he was only passionately curious. He believed we are all born into a great Mystery and he said we should stand like curious children before it.

Einstein was often so engrossed in his work that he forgot to eat lunch. He didn't notice time passing because he was connected to his deepest passion and creative source. Einstein believed the development of our creative powers is a person's most valuable asset in life

Einstein was convinced that a force or a spirit is manifest in the laws of the universe, a spirit that is vastly superior to us humans and that is beyond anything we can comprehend. He said that when we try to penetrate the secrets of nature with our limited means, we find something subtle, intangible, and inexplicable.

Einstein knew that death is not an end. He believed we live on in our children and in the younger generation. He said that our children are us, and that our bodies are like "wilted leaves on the tree of life." He understood that our existence on earth is fleeting. He described our existence like a brief visit in a strange house.

Einstein knew that a human being is part of a whole but as humans, we experience ourselves, our thoughts and our feelings as something separate from the rest. He called this separation an "optical delusion." He said we aren't really separate at all.

Einstein believed that when a whole group of individuals becomes a "we," they collectively reach as high as human beings can reach. He believed that a sense of responsibility toward others is more important than power, success, fame and honour. He saw service to the community as one of life's highest achievements. He knew that the fate of the human race depends upon the moral strength of human beings and he believed it's our sacred human responsibility to be the best we can be.

Are you being the best you can be?

Wednesday, October 30, 2013

Choosing the Ideal Wedding Shoes

The selection of bridal shoes may not be on the top of your list of priorities when it comes to planning your big day. However, it is absolutely essential to spend time searching for a comfortable pair that also complements your gown. You'll find your chosen wedding dress designers will most likely be more than happy to provide some recommendations and these tips below might also help.

Select a Fabric

Many wedding dress designers will advise you to choose shoes made from raw silk or satin. That's because these same materials are likely to be used in the creation of your gown. However, you might also think about buying shoes made from crepe or matt satin as a suitable choice. A contrast such as this can also act as a feature of the outfit.

Consider the Colour

Those who take the traditional approach will undoubtedly be keen to find shoes in the same colour as the bridal gown. However, if you find the perfect pair in a contrasting colour, you might choose to have them dyed to match. You can even choose silver or gold shoes to match your accessories.

Opt for Comfort Over Style

You might well have set your heart on a pair of sleek and stylish high-heeled shoes. However, it would be sensible to try them out first so you are assured of being comfortable on your big day. If you're really worried about the prospect of ending up as a princess with blisters, it may be advisable to make a more conservative choice. You might enjoy ultimate comfort in a pair of satin slippers, or even a pair of exquisitely decorated flip-flops for a beach ceremony.

Think About the Weather

If you're planning a winter wedding you'll need to choose the footwear accordingly. Even if you opt for style over warmth for the ceremony, a pair of fake fur boots can see you through the rest of the reception if needs be - and add to the fairy-tale of a winter wedding. Alternatively for a midsummer wedding you might choose a pair of sparkly sandals or flip flops as mentioned above. Most wedding dress designers will be able to provide information about the seasonal trends.

Find Shoes to Suit Your Budget

It's worth bearing in mind there is a great deal of variation in the price of bridal shoes. It might be possible to find a discounted pair at the local shoe sellers, or alternatively you could head online and search for a pair of luxury Swarovski crystal encrusted shoes. You may even choose to enlist the help of wedding dress designers for a custom made pair.

Wigs Vs Weaves

I have never worn a full weave but I have used pieces in my hair to create a look and I didn't care for it. Let me tell you why I don't like weaves. The hairdresser uses glue to hold the pieces into the hair and I found that this actually will take your hair out. My natural hair was getting snatched out when I would try to remove the pieces from my head and sometimes I had a hard time removing the pieces because of this. I didn't want to keep pulling out my natural hair and weaves are expensive to begin with. It costs a lot of money to get a weave and has a lot more maintenance to it. I also heard the full weaves are painful because they sew the hair in.

I prefer wigs over weaves easily. Wigs are temporary. You can change them according to the weather, your outfit for the day and the style you are going for. I like the fact that I can have short hair one day and long hair the next. I can have straight hair or curly. If I want my hair a different color without changing my natural color then I can buy a wig and put it on for instant color change. They are great for women who have gray hair and get tired of dying their natural hair all the time.

Trying a wig is a good way to see what you look like with another hair style or hair color before doing something drastically permanent to your hair. Some women will chop all their hair off and a week or two later they realize they wish they had never cut their hair. Wigs can solve this problem so you can have an idea on what you will look like with short hair.

Wigs are not that expensive unless you want human hair but you can buy a synthetic hair wig and they look just as real as human hair. Maintenance of a wig is minimal. Washing them with a mild soap then rinsing and hanging it on a wig stand is all that is needed to keep it up. After a while the wig will get ragged looking on the ends if using synthetic hair but if price is your concern I would go for synthetic. If what you want is continual wear then buy human hair wigs.

Tuesday, October 29, 2013

The Baby Boomer Woman's Guide to Looking Younger Than Your Age

Can you really accurately guess a person's age? I think it is the hardest thing to do. Is a child 2, 3 or 4? Is a teenager 13 or 17? Is a Baby Boomer woman 51, 59 or 67? We take lots of things into consideration when we make age judgments - physical body, dressing, posture, words and attitude.

When a woman says she wants to look younger than her age, it is about perceptions and expectations. Today's Baby Boomer woman has grown up and participated more openly and actively in society than her mother. She will usually have worked longer, be better off financially, be healthier, have travelled more and have a global rather than a small community awareness.

As we age, we fear becoming invisible, overlooked and not actively contributing to society. It is stagnation we fear more than growth. Stagnation makes others perceive you as being older.

Each day you live you are getting older. If you stop to think about what age you want to be perceived as being, it is more about being active, noticeable, vital, energetic and seen as a valuable consumer.

Read on for my three-point Baby Boomer woman's guide to looking younger than your age.

Your Skin

As you stayed in or came back into the workforce, you have been judged on your skin. Australians spend $300 million a year on Botox to get rid of facial wrinkles. Some of that amount includes men. Women have always been judged more on looks than men and many industries have judged older women harshly. Botox was seen as the No 1 way to look years younger.

It is changing as now the UK President of the Plastic Surgeons Association openly says that looking younger was never about wrinkles. It is about skin tone and texture. The young have clearer dewy skin. He admits that plastic surgery cannot create that. So skin care and cosmetic retailers, Multi-Level Marketing companies and beauty therapists provide products that reduce the pigmentation of aging and add light to create a younger, dewy look. It is a massive growth industry.

Look after your skin and choose the products and treatments that fit your budget and your environmental focus.

Your Hair and Makeup

After your skin tone, people notice your hair and makeup. Grey hair does not necessarily age you nor does coloured hair always make you look younger. Our skin tone lightens with age: so add lighter variations of your basic colour to keep your hair looking natural. It is easy to recognise when a woman is trying too hard to look younger.

Keep your hairstyle modern. A small tweak can make you look younger and slimmer regardless of your wrinkles. We judge a woman's age on how current her hairstyle looks.

It is the same with makeup. Modern makeup is more natural than heavy. So is eye makeup and lipstick. How long has it been since you changed your foundation, eye shadow, eyebrow pencil and lipstick colours? Eyebrows (particularly thin shapes and darkly pencilled colours) are aging giveaways.

Your Clothes

Women's fashion has always been in evolution. Yes, styles are recycled but they are never interpreted exactly the same way. Because your clothing covers a large proportion of your body, its prominence is a focus for guessing your age. First impressions count.

It is not about slavishly following every trend or sticking rigidly to one style forever. It is about being selective. Choose what suits you and interpret it in modern, stylish ways to look current and individual. That is the secret.

Last Words

As a Baby Boomer woman you have to decide how you want your physical appearance and dress to be perceived. Is it as being a certain age or as having a certain ageless attitude? It is your decision.

Fashion Tips for an Apple-Shaped Body to Make You Look Fabulous

Ah, the amazing and beautiful apple-shaped body - how can you tell that you have one? Well, typically, an apple-shaped body consists of a rounded tummy (which is ever-so-beautiful!) and a bigger bust. While this shape is amazing, it's also a little hard to dress, as you can find things to fit your stomach and show off your legs, but your bust is a little large. If you've been trying to find fashion tips for an apple-shaped body, look no further! I've got all of the tips you'll ever need to make you look beautiful, no matter how busty you are!

Don't Hide Your Shape

No matter what shape you are, apple, pear or even hourglass, don't ever hide your shape! Instead, flaunt it a little! You should be proud of yourself and how beautiful you are. So that means, don't hide your shape in baggy dresses, in baggy pants and in clothes that don't fit you. Instead, go for boot-cut or straight-legged trousers with a flat front and a wide waist-band. These are the pants that look the best on an apple shape!

Use Structure

By far, one of the best things about your particular body type ladies, is the fact that awesome structured jackets look amazing on you! Pair them with a flowing dress or long skirt and you're a trendsetter! One fashion tip though, avoid double-breasted jackets, as they can actually make you look more bustier than you are and you don't want that!

Vibrant Patterns Look Lovely

Patterns are something that your particular body shape can pull off beautifully! Vibrant patterns will really make you stand out in a crowd and yet will keep your tummy looking amazing. Pairing your vibrant colored top with some lighter colored bottoms is a great way to really give into your shape. Also, if you are wearing a dress, a-line shapes are fantastic for an apple-shape!

Open Necklines Are a Must

Finally, v-neck shapes are a fashion tip that all apple-shaped women should know! Whether it be a wrap dress or a halter, v-necks are something that will show off your goods - while not giving away too much. A side-tie dress is also something that will draw attention away from those bits that you might not be fond of, so keep that in mind when you're choosing a dress!

So girls, these are just a very few of the top fashion tips that will really make your apple-shape look beautiful! Just remember, no matter what shape you are, you are beautiful and you should flaunt your shape! So ladies, what other fashion tips do you have to share with me?

Monday, October 28, 2013

Choose Your Wedding Accessories

When it comes to wedding accessories, do you know which ones you have in mind or are you struggling to know where to begin? If you know you fall into the latter group, don't worry. Lots of people focus on the big things then realise nearer the time that they haven't thought about the accessories at all.

We're here to help though, so if you need some tips and advice, keep reading to find out more.

Favours

No bridal ceremony would be complete without these - the piece de resistance of all wedding accessories. The easiest way to begin here is to think about what kind of theme you are having for your event. If you want a classic style, you should carry this idea through to the favours as well. If you want something thoroughly modern, featuring a couple of bright colours to perk things up, take these colours as your cue instead. Seasonally themed events are also good for inspiration when it comes to choosing the most appropriate favours.

Table decorations

When it comes to planning the after party, so to speak, you'll need a good selection of table decorations to help complete the look. Remember, your table decorations should tie in with the overall look and theme, so bear this in mind when planning the look.

You'll need tablecloths, place cards and centrepieces at the bare minimum. Other than that you have things like tea light holders, trims, napkin rings and other additional items if you want to use them. Remember less can often be more, and with a budget to think about as well, you will probably need to consider carefully how many additional items you can actually afford.

Don't forget your own accessories

Of course, wedding accessories aren't just the items that make your reception perfect. The phrase also relates to those things you'll wear to complete your outfit on the day. You'll need to consider earrings, a necklace, and whether or not you want to top things off with a beautiful tiara. With so many choices available it couldn't be easier to get everything you need with no trouble at all.

As you can see, a bit of forward planning is all you need to keep in mind when it comes to the finer details of your big day. In fact, if you can give yourself a bit more time you'll find the whole process so much easier than it would otherwise be. It's amazing how much more stress you will feel when you know your wedding is just four weeks as opposed to four months away!

What Would You Do If Money Were Not an Object?

IMAGINE THIS...

One day you suddenly woke up with an unlimited supply of money at your fingertips. How would you feel about it? What would you spend it on? A new chapter begins: It is hard to imagine all of the possibilities suddenly available to you!

Most men I know would hurry to buy luxury cars, maybe even the most expensive car in the world like this one below from Mercedes Benz set in diamonds. The Lamborghini Veneno, a super-fast sports car goes for a cool $3.9 million dollars and only three are made each year! If driving isn't your style, you could buy a private yacht to cruise around on the ocean, the ultimate fisherman's dream! I personally prefer a private jet to avoid all the airport crowds and stress associated with travel. It comes handy once I complete my pilot license and become a pilot!

Some of us dream of something different. Most of us women would love to be able to afford the ultimate, high-end designer wardrobe with shoes, handbags, and jewelry to match. If money was no option, would you buy a Hermes Berkin bag in every color? or exotic alligator skin with diamond setting that's reserved only for special few who shop there. Or maybe Mouawad's 1001 Nights Diamond Purse, the most expensive handbag in the world priced at $3.8 million dollars. It would certainly be amazing to walk into Bergdorf Goodman, and buy whatever you would like! Just like a celebrity, you could be dripping with diamonds, and covered from head to toe in clothing straight from the runway!

Once you got your fill of diamonds and cars, you could go and eat at all of the most expensive restaurants in the world. I would definitely want to try the Haute Chocolate Ice cream from Serendipity priced at $25,000, topped with edible gold, and eaten with a golden spoon decorated with diamonds. Or you could stop for breakfast at Norma's in New York and get a $1,000 frittata, which is filled with lobster and very expensive caviar. You could even travel the world, trying different cuisines and learning from famous chefs! But I think after all of this food you would definitely have to hire a personal trainer to keep you in shape!

Think about this: How much stuff would you need to buy to truly be happy? Do you think that having an endless supply of money makes a person content? Comment and let us know! I think that no amount of money will ever be a replacement for happiness. Even when our economy was excelling in prosperity just few years ago, most people were found unhappy. That's a proven fact!

It sounds corny to say, but the best and the richest things in our lives are the things that are free, like our family, friends and pets. And I promise you, if you are ever down, instead of wishing to win the lottery, try volunteering to help someone in need and you might be surprised at how rich it makes you feel!

Sunday, October 27, 2013

Fun Facts About Watches

We all know what watches do and what they are used for, but there are tons of interesting little watch facts that many people may not be aware of. Learning about watches can be a fun thing to do before you purchase one, or just a fun way to broaden your general knowledge. Here are some cool facts about watches.

The first way to ever tell time was with the sun dial, which was originally created by the Egyptians.

Waterclocks were the next way of telling time invented, and were generally thought to be more accurate than sundials.

Originally, watches were so big that they were commonly worn around the neck on a chain.

The wristwatch as we know it, was invented in 1868 by Patek Philippe.

Before they were for everyone, wristwatches were originally for women, while men generally used pocket watches.

During World War I, wristwatches became popular with men because it was more convenient to wear it on the wrist during battle. Men were able to tell the time without having to pull out a separate item.

The first water proof watch was invented in 1926

Watches on display and in ads are mostly set to ten minute to two o'clock. This is because it gives it the appearance that it is smiling, encouraging the consumer to feel good when they look at the time piece.

The most expensive watch is the Chopard 201 carat watch. The jewels and diamonds in the watch make it beyond valuable. It includes 443 yellow diamonds, 139 round diamonds, 289 pear shaped diamonds, and 3 heart shaped diamonds. It was sold at an auction for 25 million dollars.

When pocket watches were commonly worn, they only had an hour hand. This made them terribly inaccurate and they would lose several hours as the day went on.

The first digital electronic watch was developed in 1970 by Hamilton Watch Company and Electro-Data.

Swiss watches are considered some of the best around. In order to be considered a swiss watch, there are certain rules that must be met. It must have a swiss movement that was set in its case in Switzerland and created by a manufacturer of Swiss origin.

You may have noticed that some watches contain the word Geneve. This term is a mark of prestige given to time pieces that is given by the Bureau de controle des Montres de Geneva.

Saturday, October 26, 2013

Is Leather the New Choice for Intimate Apparel?

Leather is a wonderful material. If you can get past the fact that you are wearing the skin or hide of another animal, then you can really start to appreciate all of the fantastic qualities that leather provides.

Is leather the new choice for intimate apparel? It is not that time any more when lingerie used to be only lacy and frilly. Leather is an in thing these days, looking as glamorous as lace lingerie. It is gradually becoming popular and gaining acceptance in the fashion world. Leather is also being paired with a number of other clothing items, to create a unique effect. This article seeks to study this fashion of leather in detail.

Leather lingerie today is available both for men and women, in a variety of colours, patterns and finishes. Pants, Skirts, Shorts, Belts, corsets, bras, teddies, panties, stockings, thongs, etc. are some of the commonly available types of leather lingerie. The sizes available range from normal to extreme plus. Leather lingerie is commonly available in the traditional colours of leather such as black, brown, white, and tan. A number of lingerie producers have now started producing leather lingerie ranges, sensing the rising demand for the same. Leather lingerie is easily available in most lingerie shops over the world, as well as in online stores.

The quality and feel of leather depends upon a number of factors, such as the properties of the leather originally used, the agents that are added during the process of making the garment, as well as the technology used for the same. Modern technology has made it possible to make leather lingerie in different colours than the traditional ones, and to give different types of finishes to them.

The kinds of leather that are commonly used to produce garments are those of the cow, pig, sheep and goat. These days, artificial or man-made leather is also being largely used for the production of garments, which is known as faux leather. Faux leather is similar to original leather in appearance and qualities, except for the smell. Moreover, it is cheaper than original leather.

There are many reasons as to why leather is being preferred by more and more women around the globe. First of all, leather lingerie looks absolutely gorgeous and sensuous. Available in a variety of sizes, colours, finishes, and patterns, leather lingerie makes a wonderful fashion statement. It is suitable for all body sizes.

Trapped in a Fashion Rut? Here's the Secret to Getting Out!

You want to get out of your fashion rut and feel good about how you look, but every time you go shopping you leave discouraged or overwhelmed. The reason has as much to do with your mind as it does with your body and by incorporating two very important changes to your shopping experience, you can find new success every time you shop.

Think about it. You have been in a fashion rut for years (or maybe it just feels that way!). Nothing you buy ever feels right any more. You've resorted to reading fashion magazines with titles like "99 Little Ways to Your Best Body" or "200 Secrets to Looking Great Now" with less than flattering results, and you even allowed your two best friends to take you shopping. Yes, they helped you choose new clothes, so why don't you feel any better? Even after that intervention, you are still in a rut (you can't remember what you are supposed to do with that long flowy plaid vest anyway?). You feel like an imposter every time you look in the mirror where a poor imitation of your friend stares back at you. You're $500 lighter and no closer to finding a wardrobe that makes you happy. A cloud of hopelessness is descending so now what, you wonder!

The key here is that you don't feel confident choosing clothes that you feel good wearing because you don't love your body and you think nothing looks good on you. You feel like your body parts are shifting nearly daily or you've gained weight (or both) and somehow clothes just don't fit the way they used to. You hyper focus on the parts of your body you don't like and when you do go shopping all you see are things that don't look good. You walk into a store and walk out again empty handed or you take those two well-meaning friends with you and walk out with clothes, but you don't really feel any better when you get dressed than you did before you went shopping. Fashion magazines aren't helping -- they are all written for svelte twenty year olds who could be your daughters -- and you don't know where to turn. All you can think is that nothing works and that you're doomed to look frumpy and boring for the rest of your life.

You're left wondering that if magazines and makeover TV shows (where all the style gurus are handing down valuable fashion advice) and even your stylish friends can't help, what hope is there for you? Wow... with that kind of attitude I can see where shopping would not be fun and it certainly wouldn't be productive.

I promise, however, there is plenty of hope. First of all, when you look out into the real world, do you see women (be they female friends, family or strangers you've seen at the mall, work or grocery store) whose image you admire -- women who look like they are well put together whether it's for work or leisure? Of course you do. Get a picture in your mind's eye of two or three of them and ask yourself this one important question: Are they all built like a super model? No, of course they are not and this is good news! Chances are good you are not shaped like a super model (I know I'm not!) and you just confirmed that you do not have to be super model tall, thin and very young to look great. You can look great no matter what size you wear, how tall you are or how young or old you are. These women prove it -- they are just like you with things they like and don't like about their bodies.

What these women do have that you don't is two things:

  1. Fashion guidelines to help you identify garments/outfits that have potential, and
  2. The belief that you CAN create a look you love.

These two things lead to increased self-confidence and the well put-together look you want for yourself.

Is this learnable? Yes.

Did they learn all of this in one day? No.

So, give yourself a break, use the information I'm about to share with you to move you step-by-step closer to having that put-together look you long for and the self-confidence will grow with each positive step.

So, where do you start?

Begin with your mindset. Otherwise, the fashion tools will be ineffective. Why? Because you get what you expect and if you expect not to find anything you love or you find something you love but they don't make it in your size or you approach the shopping experience as if you were going into a losing battle, guess what you'll get: nothing you like (everything will seem ugly, shapeless and too trendy) and things that don't fit. You will prove yourself right.

Even if this has been true in the past, you must find a glimmer of hope in your shopping experience because if your expectations are based on the past and the past wasn't good, then guess what you'll get now? That's right... more of the same.

Or, if your past shopping experiences were terrific, but now your body has changed (and not in a way that makes you happy) and you can no longer wear what you used to, but you wish you could and berate your body for not staying the way it was (you can see where this is going... ), then you will go in with frustrated energy and all you will see are things that were created for your former body. Your mindset is crucial to a successful shopping experience.

Okay, you say, but how do I do that when I can feel my anxiety rising when I simply think about shopping, never mind step into a store!

Create a positive affirmation and visualize success. You have to train your mind to approach the shopping experience from a different place. Here's a great one for starters: "More and more I find clothes I love and that look great on me." Notice I didn't say, "Everything looks good on me." Or "I look great in everything I try on." Even I (who knows what I am doing when it comes to shopping for clothes) do not look great in everything I try on and I won't even think about shopping when I'm crabby or don't think I'll find anything I like. My results will be the same as yours would be -- my mind will say, "You think you'll only find things you don't like or that don't fit you well or are too young or badly made? Great... let me go find those things for you so you won't be disappointed!" I've had this happen and I now know to laugh at myself and realize I went in with a bad attitude!

Create a positive affirmation that you can relate to. Then, don't just say the affirmation once and wait for fairy dust to sprinkle down on your head and the perfect new store to open next door (although, hey, wouldn't that be nice if it happened!). Say it over and over. Say it with as much joy and positive expectation as you can muster. Your mind/body believes what you tell it, so tell it something good and positive. Give your mind the assignment of finding things that will make you happy rather than prove you right that there's nothing out there that looks good on you.

Then, as you are heading out to shop, visualize yourself having a great experience finding things you love in your size and color. Picture yourself trying something on and feel amazing. (It's less about the specific item -- so you don't have to visualize exactly what that amazing piece is -- and more about the feeling attached to it.) If you start to get overwhelmed and some of that old history comes flooding back (which it will from time to time), take a deep breath and repeat the affirmation and visualization.

Getting your mindset heading in a positive uplifting direction first is critical. Once that is flowing we can add in a few fashion tools to get you started.

Most of us, myself included, need to have guidelines when we shop. Understanding how to create a look you love takes more than just walking into a store and grabbing something random off the rack hoping it will work because it looks good on the mannequin or you saw it in a magazine. It is important to make your selections with intention. Knowing what to look for helps you ignore the parts of the store that don't work for you and concentrate on the parts that do. Follow these rules for more success when you shop:

  • Search for colors that look great on you. If you don't have a personalized color palette here are some basic guidelines. Do not buy light gray, yellow, army green or beige unless you are absolutely sure it is your perfect color. When in doubt (which should be most of the time with those colors), choose one of these colors: emerald to forest green, deep periwinkle, medium to deep teal, or watermelon. These colors all look good on a lot of people.
  • Make sure it fits. While this is not the only criteria for choosing a garment, it is very important. For instance, be sure the fabric skims your body and doesn't cling too tightly or look too big and messy (lift your arms and if there is a lot of excess fabric there that creates buckling at the bustline, then the top is too big). And, if it doesn't fit consider whether it can be altered by a tailor. Yes, if you love the garment it is ALWAYS worth having it tailored. A word of caution: a current trend is for oversized, shapeless tops. I generally recommend avoiding these, but if you love them, try wearing one with a pair of skinny jeans or leggings.
  • Make sure you love it. There is no substitution for loving something you are wearing. Look for patterns that make you smile, textures that feel good and fabrics that feel nice on. Never buy something because you think you should (remember how that worked out when your friends took you shopping). You will never feel happy wearing it unless you are excited about it.

When you combine these tools with positive affirmations and visualizations, you are setting yourself up for success -- one step at a time.

Remember, keep these ideas in mind when you shop:

  • Look for color, good fit and things that make you smile when you look at them.
  • Don't go shopping until you have done your affirmations and visualizations. Don't just say them rotely -- they won't work. Say them with passion, desire, as much positive belief as you can muster and say them often!

You WILL make progress if you do this.

You have to start somewhere or you'll stay mired in doubt and frustration for the rest of your life -- never feeling good about how you look and envying the women who do. That is no way to live and, better yet, it's absolutely unnecessary. You CAN look great. I have just shared several steps you can take in your journey towards feeling like one of those women whose image you admire. Just take it one step at a time and celebrate each success no matter how small. You will get there!

Friday, October 25, 2013

Understanding Wedding Dress Design and Alteration

Has the man of your dreams finally popped the question? Are you soon to be a blushing bride? If you are starting to plan a wedding and are thinking hard about the dress for your special day, why not consider getting one made just for you? There are many independent bridal dress designers who will be happy to take your ideas and design a dress that will see you walking down the aisle as the perfect bride. Dress alterations are included in the bespoke service, so if the design is not as you would like it on the first fitting, you can have things altered to suit.

The Bespoke Service

Many people choose their wedding dress straight from the hanger and, with so many to choose from, this suits many a bride. Dress alterations are then done to tailor the chosen gown to fit the individual. For those who cannot find the perfect dress, however, the bespoke service is the way forward. It really does not matter if you have an idea of what you would like or not, as the designer you choose to employ will guide you through the process and open you up to ideas you may never have even considered. It is a good idea, though, to take along any pictures or sketches you have so the designer has a starting point to work from.

Throughout the process you, as the bride, will be consulted on all the fine details and the progress of the design. For the bride, dress alterations and fittings will be carried out regularly and the final fitting will be done close to the big day itself. This ensures that everything is as perfect as it can be, and you can relax in the knowledge that you will be the most beautiful bride possible on the day.

Many ladies choose to have their bridesmaid dresses made by the same designer, which means they will perfectly complement the bride. Dress alterations can also be made on pre-purchased bridesmaid dresses so they fit perfectly.

Many wedding dress designers can also design and make accessories for your bridal outfits, including boleros, veils and any other extras you may desire. No matter whether it is lace, silk or satin, designers can work with whatever material you choose. The price will obviously reflect the material chosen and the extra detail desired, of course.

Organising a wedding can be a daunting thought, so make at least one part of it an absolute pleasure. Have your dress individually designed for you and hand over the responsibility to an expert. You can then concentrate on all of the other parts of the celebration in order to make your big day a roaring success.

Thursday, October 24, 2013

My Perfect Little Black Dress!

Finding my perfect little black dress - the ABCs!

This being the holiday season there's a particular interest in and attention to dressing. Whether you're a social butterfly with a full calendar of events to attend or you have limited your activity to some small intimate gatherings, what you wear will be important to you. The little black dress, also known as LBD, is a perennial wardrobe staple, the epitome of elegance, the term finding its origin in 1920s [its history stemming from the incomparable Coco C. [1926] and her iconic looks.]

While it debuted in a very simple, classic, slim silhouette, today's offerings run a gamut as wide-ranging as our fashion tastes dictate.

What are some important features in selecting my little black dress?

To my way of thinking you first assess your particular body type [like the Johnny Mercer song, 'accentuate the positive / eliminate the negative'] then you'll have an idea of what looks good on you. Aim to show your best features and play down the others. This includes looking at different necklines, hemlines, sleeve lengths [or sleeveless], bodices and silhouettes.

High on my list I consider the fit and feel, not just the correct size but the style [does it 'fit' me, my personality, do you match?] Ask, will I be comfortable in this look? Can I 'pull it off'? After all you want to shine - your dress should showcase you and not compete for attention. "Dress shabbily and they remember the dress; dress impeccably and they remember the woman." [Coco C.]

Then I'd want to consider how versatile does this dress have to be: Will it need to perform at multiple functions [day into evening, cocktails to formal sit-downs, does it travel well, etc.] in which case the fabric choice becomes essential as well as its potential for accessorizing. The little black dress is such a timely expression of your individual style. We are very fortunate today with the range of what's available for our choosing, that we can find such an abundant array in terms of cost from the frugal all the way to the extravagant, we really should not have a difficult time in our search. Do you gravitate toward the vintage looks or are you more sculptured or modern? Are you a trend- setter or more classic in your taste? Frou frou or formal?

Carry on, your dress is out there waiting to be discovered; but in your quest to find the perfect little black dress remember Coco's words... "The best color in the whole world is the one that looks good, on you!"

Until next time God willing!

Karen

Copr. 2013 Karen Hodge

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Are There Medications to Improve Libido Among Women?

Pharmaceutical companies throughout the world are involved in the production of different medications to deal with conditions, which may affect humans and animals. They have been extremely successful in helping beings on this planet to overcome infections and diseases of different varieties. Under the circumstances, it would be surprising to note that they have failed to discover a single medication which can improve libido among women. Even though they have been making attempts they have failed to get approved a single drug which can help women in this regard. The FDA is on record to say that they have not approved any drug for this particular purpose.

Why is it that pharmaceutical companies have failed to discover a medication which will help women enhance their libido? There are a few reasons, which bring our point towards the failure of companies like these. However, they alone cannot be blamed for the failure because the body of a woman goes through several changes, which must also be considered.

A number of issues can reduce the sex drive of a woman. Issues related to the body apart from hormonal imbalances can be part of a reduction in sex drive. Childbirth, issues with the thyroid and menopause can also contribute to this factor. Stress is a common problem with all people comes across at different stages of their lives. Unfortunately, this too can leave behind an effect which will leave women disinterested in sex. Issues of mental health, depression, medications for high blood pressure, birth control pills and antidepressants can also lead to similar problems. Therefore, it can be seen that trying to increase libido among women will require them to take several medications, which will prove difficult.

Nature has managed to provide people what pharmaceutical companies cannot. It is certain that such issues affected women even in the past when modern-day medications were not available. They may have dealt with such issues with the help of herbal concoctions or remedies. There is no doubt that treating loss of libido among women is a difficult task but there is a way by which women can keep their bodies healthy and lead a life which will prove satisfactory in all ways. Supplements made from deer antler velvet are known to increase libido both in men and women. These supplements are a gift of nature and have been used for over 2000 years. There is no reason why women cannot adopt strategies that were used in the past and begin noticing an increased interest in sexual activity. Not only can deer antler velvet supplements improve the libido but can also prove beneficial in a number of ways. Women will not find pharmaceutical grade medications to overcome such issues, but they can definitely depend upon nature to give them an opportunity to rediscover life all over again.

Fab Tips to Stop Being Such a People-Pleaser

If you ladies feel like you are constantly saying yes, despite your better judgment, why not try stopping? Why not try putting yourself first and see what that feels like? Do you have a hard time doing that? Well, take a look below, because I've got the top tips that will stop you from being a people-pleaser and will start you on the road to pleasing yourself first!

Know Your Have a Choice

A lot of people-pleasers feel as though they have absolutely no choice in the matter, but the truth is, you do! You have the choice to say no or it isn't a good time for you. You also don't have to feel guilty about that. If you are busy or you just don't want to do something, it's okay! Most of the time, people would rather you be honest and upfront with them than to do something that you don't really want to do... just because you are a people-pleaser. So, knowing that you have a choice in the matter is the first tip to stop being a people-pleaser!

Say No With Conviction

When you do finally say no, are you stern about it? Are you really firm about it? Or do you go back and forth and use a lot of 'well, maybe not'? When you do finally say no to something, you've got to say it with conviction, especially with people who just don't take the hint and who are constantly asking you to do things that are outside of your comfort zone. You can't be wishy-washy with everyone girls and you've got to sometimes, just take control and say no!

Do You Feel Like It's Worth Saying No?

While there are definitely times and places that you should say not or get out of something, you've got to consider, is it worth it? It might feel nice to tell your boss that you are really busy and can't take on a new project, even if you aren't exactly busy, but it's another thing to tell your friend that you simply can't go out to lunch with them. You've got to weigh the pros and cons of saying no and really decide if it is worth it in the long run for you!

No Excuses

One thing that a lot of people-pleasers have a hard time with is excuses. You try to make up for saying no with a lot of excuses as to why you can't be somewhere or why you can't do something. Don't do that, it can actually give the person you are saying no to a chance to wiggle you into doing the thing you wanted to say no to. Instead, just say no, no excuses needed and if you are pressed about it, just keep repeating no. I know it's hard, but it will be worth it!

Start Really Small

Finally, you can't expect to immediately slip into not being a people-pleaser if that is all you have ever known, so you've got to start out small by saying no to that friend that is constantly asking to borrow things or for you to drive them places. Say no to them once, twice, three times and eventually, they will get the hint that you aren't going to be taken advantage of anymore. Just start out small!

So gals, these are just a couple of the ways you can stop being a people-pleaser and instead, start to please yourself. I know it's hard, but it definitely is worth it once you finally break the habit of constantly saying yes all of the time. So, are you a people-pleaser? Have you ever said no? Tell me about it!

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Trapped in a Fashion Rut? Here's the Secret to Getting Out!

You want to get out of your fashion rut and feel good about how you look, but every time you go shopping you leave discouraged or overwhelmed. The reason has as much to do with your mind as it does with your body and by incorporating two very important changes to your shopping experience, you can find new success every time you shop.

Think about it. You have been in a fashion rut for years (or maybe it just feels that way!). Nothing you buy ever feels right any more. You've resorted to reading fashion magazines with titles like "99 Little Ways to Your Best Body" or "200 Secrets to Looking Great Now" with less than flattering results, and you even allowed your two best friends to take you shopping. Yes, they helped you choose new clothes, so why don't you feel any better? Even after that intervention, you are still in a rut (you can't remember what you are supposed to do with that long flowy plaid vest anyway?). You feel like an imposter every time you look in the mirror where a poor imitation of your friend stares back at you. You're $500 lighter and no closer to finding a wardrobe that makes you happy. A cloud of hopelessness is descending so now what, you wonder!

The key here is that you don't feel confident choosing clothes that you feel good wearing because you don't love your body and you think nothing looks good on you. You feel like your body parts are shifting nearly daily or you've gained weight (or both) and somehow clothes just don't fit the way they used to. You hyper focus on the parts of your body you don't like and when you do go shopping all you see are things that don't look good. You walk into a store and walk out again empty handed or you take those two well-meaning friends with you and walk out with clothes, but you don't really feel any better when you get dressed than you did before you went shopping. Fashion magazines aren't helping -- they are all written for svelte twenty year olds who could be your daughters -- and you don't know where to turn. All you can think is that nothing works and that you're doomed to look frumpy and boring for the rest of your life.

You're left wondering that if magazines and makeover TV shows (where all the style gurus are handing down valuable fashion advice) and even your stylish friends can't help, what hope is there for you? Wow... with that kind of attitude I can see where shopping would not be fun and it certainly wouldn't be productive.

I promise, however, there is plenty of hope. First of all, when you look out into the real world, do you see women (be they female friends, family or strangers you've seen at the mall, work or grocery store) whose image you admire -- women who look like they are well put together whether it's for work or leisure? Of course you do. Get a picture in your mind's eye of two or three of them and ask yourself this one important question: Are they all built like a super model? No, of course they are not and this is good news! Chances are good you are not shaped like a super model (I know I'm not!) and you just confirmed that you do not have to be super model tall, thin and very young to look great. You can look great no matter what size you wear, how tall you are or how young or old you are. These women prove it -- they are just like you with things they like and don't like about their bodies.

What these women do have that you don't is two things:

  1. Fashion guidelines to help you identify garments/outfits that have potential, and
  2. The belief that you CAN create a look you love.

These two things lead to increased self-confidence and the well put-together look you want for yourself.

Is this learnable? Yes.

Did they learn all of this in one day? No.

So, give yourself a break, use the information I'm about to share with you to move you step-by-step closer to having that put-together look you long for and the self-confidence will grow with each positive step.

So, where do you start?

Begin with your mindset. Otherwise, the fashion tools will be ineffective. Why? Because you get what you expect and if you expect not to find anything you love or you find something you love but they don't make it in your size or you approach the shopping experience as if you were going into a losing battle, guess what you'll get: nothing you like (everything will seem ugly, shapeless and too trendy) and things that don't fit. You will prove yourself right.

Even if this has been true in the past, you must find a glimmer of hope in your shopping experience because if your expectations are based on the past and the past wasn't good, then guess what you'll get now? That's right... more of the same.

Or, if your past shopping experiences were terrific, but now your body has changed (and not in a way that makes you happy) and you can no longer wear what you used to, but you wish you could and berate your body for not staying the way it was (you can see where this is going... ), then you will go in with frustrated energy and all you will see are things that were created for your former body. Your mindset is crucial to a successful shopping experience.

Okay, you say, but how do I do that when I can feel my anxiety rising when I simply think about shopping, never mind step into a store!

Create a positive affirmation and visualize success. You have to train your mind to approach the shopping experience from a different place. Here's a great one for starters: "More and more I find clothes I love and that look great on me." Notice I didn't say, "Everything looks good on me." Or "I look great in everything I try on." Even I (who knows what I am doing when it comes to shopping for clothes) do not look great in everything I try on and I won't even think about shopping when I'm crabby or don't think I'll find anything I like. My results will be the same as yours would be -- my mind will say, "You think you'll only find things you don't like or that don't fit you well or are too young or badly made? Great... let me go find those things for you so you won't be disappointed!" I've had this happen and I now know to laugh at myself and realize I went in with a bad attitude!

Create a positive affirmation that you can relate to. Then, don't just say the affirmation once and wait for fairy dust to sprinkle down on your head and the perfect new store to open next door (although, hey, wouldn't that be nice if it happened!). Say it over and over. Say it with as much joy and positive expectation as you can muster. Your mind/body believes what you tell it, so tell it something good and positive. Give your mind the assignment of finding things that will make you happy rather than prove you right that there's nothing out there that looks good on you.

Then, as you are heading out to shop, visualize yourself having a great experience finding things you love in your size and color. Picture yourself trying something on and feel amazing. (It's less about the specific item -- so you don't have to visualize exactly what that amazing piece is -- and more about the feeling attached to it.) If you start to get overwhelmed and some of that old history comes flooding back (which it will from time to time), take a deep breath and repeat the affirmation and visualization.

Getting your mindset heading in a positive uplifting direction first is critical. Once that is flowing we can add in a few fashion tools to get you started.

Most of us, myself included, need to have guidelines when we shop. Understanding how to create a look you love takes more than just walking into a store and grabbing something random off the rack hoping it will work because it looks good on the mannequin or you saw it in a magazine. It is important to make your selections with intention. Knowing what to look for helps you ignore the parts of the store that don't work for you and concentrate on the parts that do. Follow these rules for more success when you shop:

  • Search for colors that look great on you. If you don't have a personalized color palette here are some basic guidelines. Do not buy light gray, yellow, army green or beige unless you are absolutely sure it is your perfect color. When in doubt (which should be most of the time with those colors), choose one of these colors: emerald to forest green, deep periwinkle, medium to deep teal, or watermelon. These colors all look good on a lot of people.
  • Make sure it fits. While this is not the only criteria for choosing a garment, it is very important. For instance, be sure the fabric skims your body and doesn't cling too tightly or look too big and messy (lift your arms and if there is a lot of excess fabric there that creates buckling at the bustline, then the top is too big). And, if it doesn't fit consider whether it can be altered by a tailor. Yes, if you love the garment it is ALWAYS worth having it tailored. A word of caution: a current trend is for oversized, shapeless tops. I generally recommend avoiding these, but if you love them, try wearing one with a pair of skinny jeans or leggings.
  • Make sure you love it. There is no substitution for loving something you are wearing. Look for patterns that make you smile, textures that feel good and fabrics that feel nice on. Never buy something because you think you should (remember how that worked out when your friends took you shopping). You will never feel happy wearing it unless you are excited about it.

When you combine these tools with positive affirmations and visualizations, you are setting yourself up for success -- one step at a time.

Remember, keep these ideas in mind when you shop:

  • Look for color, good fit and things that make you smile when you look at them.
  • Don't go shopping until you have done your affirmations and visualizations. Don't just say them rotely -- they won't work. Say them with passion, desire, as much positive belief as you can muster and say them often!

You WILL make progress if you do this.

You have to start somewhere or you'll stay mired in doubt and frustration for the rest of your life -- never feeling good about how you look and envying the women who do. That is no way to live and, better yet, it's absolutely unnecessary. You CAN look great. I have just shared several steps you can take in your journey towards feeling like one of those women whose image you admire. Just take it one step at a time and celebrate each success no matter how small. You will get there!

Monday, October 21, 2013

The Role of the Woman: A Biblical View

The Role of Women in the Church

Mary, a devoted Christian, wants to be involved in ministry at her church. Before she commits, she has a few questions about the role of women in the church. In light of the debate between egalitarianism and complementarianism, she and others like her need answers.

First, it is necessary to define the opposing positions. Egalitarianism is a belief in human equality especially with respect to social, political, and economic affairs. It asserts that there should be no gender-based role distinctions or limitations placed on women in the home, church, or society. [1] According to this view, women can serve as pastors in light of passages like Galatians 3:28 which says, "There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither bond nor free, there is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ Jesus".

Complementarianism "is the theological view that although men and women are created equal in their being and personhood, they are created to complement each other via different roles and responsibilities as manifested in marriage, family life, religious leadership and elsewhere. It is rooted in more literal interpretations of the creation account and the roles of men and women presented in Scripture". [2] Bible passages like I Timothy 2:11-15 are used by many to support this view. It says, "Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach nor to usurp authority over the man, but to learn in silence. For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding, she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety".

Now, attention will be given to two more passages of Scripture. I Corinthians 14:34-35 says, "Let your women keep silence in the churches for it is not permitted unto them to speak, but they are commanded to be under obedience as also saith the law. And if they will learn anything, let them ask their husbands at home for it is a shame for women to speak in the church". I Timothy 3:2 says, "A bishop then must be blameless, the husband of one wife, vigilant, sober, of good behavior, given to hospitality, apt to teach". In light of these two passages, it is understandable that complementarians believe themselves to be correct in their position. These passages clearly distinguish gender and seem to impose restrictions based on such.

To properly interpret these passages, careful exegesis must be done in order to understand what the Bible writers really meant. It is unsafe and unwise to isolate a passage of Scripture concerning any given subject. All passages related to the subject must be thoroughly studied to avoid taking any passage out of its originally intended context. It is important that readers refrain from assigning their own cultural biases. It is equally important that readers recognize how, in some cases, their own lack of education can hinder their ability to accurately interpret Scripture. A certain foundation of knowledge upon which to build understanding is essential.

For example, one must know the meaning of words in order to understand the thoughts expressed by those words. Similarly, one cannot follow the instruction to walk two blocks and turn left if he does not know how many blocks equal two or the difference between left and right. Reading comprehension skills and the illumination of the Holy Spirit are imperative.

In three of the aforementioned passages of Scripture, there appears to be a gender-based restriction placed on women in the church. However, Paul wrote these passages during a time of great Hellenistic influence. Many of the surrounding pagan religions featured priestesses who made loud, seemingly meaningless utterances. The church wanted to distinguish itself from such. Christian leaders worked to show an affinity to Greek social and philosophical life due to the constant threat of persecution and scandal, but at the same time similarities to fertility cults and Gnostic groups was downplayed. [3]

This accounts for Paul's apparent contradiction to Galatians 3:28, Romans 16:1,7 which support egalitarianism. Acts 10:34 says, "God is no respecter of persons". The Bible is inspired and inerrant and, therefore, cannot contradict itself.

"The contradictory nature of Paul's statements is explored and distinction made between those that are universally normative and those that are culturally relative. Just as certain statements regarding slavery are no longer applicable today so certain statement regarding women better served another age". [4]

God has and will always use women as He sees fit to advance the gospel and unite the Body of Christ. The giftedness of women in ministry and their fruitful effectiveness even as elders and deacons testify of His blessing. The whole of Scripture clearly reveals God's egalitarian attitude toward women.

BIBLIOGRAPHY

[1] Prince, Matthew and Zatlyn, Michelle, http://www.theopedia.com/complementarianism, CloudFare, Inc. (accessed December 2, 2013)

[2] Ibid.

[3] Elwell, Walter A., Evangelical Dictionary of Theology, Second Ed., Ordination of Women, (Article) p. 1286, Grand Rapids, MI Baker Book House Company 1984, 2001

[4] Elwell, Walter A., Evangelical Dictionary of Theology, Second Ed., Women in the Church, (Article) p. 1291, Grand Rapids, MI Baker Book House Company 1984, 2001

Mother's Intuition - Fact or Folklore?

Like most mothers, I feel a deep connection to my son. A few years ago, I experienced "mother's intuition" at its finest, in a strange and wonderful way.

My son, Sam, was attending college in Boston and he called to say he wasn't feeling well. What started out as a bad cold had progressed to what seemed like a nasty flu. He went to a walk-in clinic, was prescribed antibiotics and a cough suppressant, and was told to take the medication and return in two days. I spoke to him on the phone after he had returned from the clinic. He was going to take his first dose of medication and go to bed. Because he was under a doctor's care and on medication, I trusted that he would soon be back to his old, healthy self.

A few hours later, I felt a strange urge to meditate and send some "healing energy" to my son. This was really foreign to me. I had never done anything like it before, and didn't know where the impulse came from. While I had been dabbling with meditation, I had never attempted to use it to send energy to anyone. It sounded rather silly. But there the compulsion was, sitting in my head (at least I thought it was in my head-I found out later that it actually came from my heart). Strange as it seemed, I decided to listen to this natural inclination.

I began to meditate and I visualized Sam standing before me, facing me. In my mind, I put my hands on his head and started to massage his scalp. I was hoping these efforts would help him to sleep really well so he would wake up feeling better in the morning. In the visualization, he leaned into me and placed his head on my shoulder. I kept massaging his head and his back, returning him to an upright position because it was easier to massage him that way. But Sam kept leaning into me and putting his head on my shoulder. This happened quite a few times in the meditation, so I eventually gave up and continued to massage his head and back from this position. After about 20 minutes of visualizing this I grew tired and fell asleep, hoping that he would have a restful and restorative sleep.

Meanwhile, a few hours after talking to me on the phone, Sam took his first round of antibiotics. Shortly after, his world began to tilt and flash and he started to vomit blood. His room-mate called 911 and he was rushed to the hospital via ambulance. Sam was experiencing a severe allergic reaction to the antibiotic he had taken. Completely unaware of his crisis, I was engaged in my impromptu meditation, sending Sam "healing energy" because of the strange compulsion I felt.

When Sam came home for Christmas two weeks after his trip to the hospital, he and I were talking about what happened. I remembered the visualization and I was curious about the timing of events. I didn't mention the visualization until he had explained the timeline of his ordeal. I was dumbfounded when he told me that he was in the ambulance heading to the hospital somewhere between 8:00 pm and 9:00 pm. This was the exact time I felt the need to visualize the healing massage. It was the exact time he kept leaning into me and putting his head on my shoulder as I tried to massage him!

There is a difference between thinking and knowing. When we think, we use our brain and this requires a low level of awareness. When we know something, we use our intuition and this requires a much higher level of awareness. We think with our brain but we know with our heart.

Our heart is in constant communication with us. It always communicates. It never stops. But the messages from our heart come to us in intangible ways. We can't see or touch the messages, we can only feel or perceive them because they come to us outside of our reasoning process. The information we perceive with our heart comes to us through an intuitive process. We seem to somehow just know things without knowing how we know.

When we learn to tap into this knowing, our heart guides us in strange and wonderful ways, just as it did when my son was in crisis. While my brain wasn't aware of his crisis, my heart somehow knew. The paramedics and doctors helped him physically, and I helped him energetically without even realizing what was happening.

Not everything can be proven. Some things just have to be experienced.

We all have access to deep intuition, especially us moms.

In order to tap into your mother's intuition, all you need to do is accept, trust, and act upon the deep urges you feel in your heart whenever you experience them.

Sunday, October 20, 2013

The Beauty Myth - How Do Women Really Feel About Their Looks?

In 1991, Naomi Wolf published The Beauty Myth detailing her understanding on how women continue to be oppressed throughout society for the benefit of men.

Wolf argued that the instigation and use of the myth of beauty would be men's ultimate weapon against women and their perceived rising power.

Women continue to face blockades in the workplace due to the political and systemic use of beauty to define worth. Although men define the ideology of beauty, the demarcation of beauty is not defined thereby leaving the female confused about her own feelings of self.

This allows big corporations to levy unfairly the work that women do increasing their revenue whilst enriching both female expenditure and manageability. This has in turn reduced the female's self-esteem, a powerful tool for control.

Naomi Wolf wrote this book in 1991 following both the first and second wave of feminisms. Are we embarking upon a third wave of feminism? Many skeptics of feminism report that the previously overwhelming injustice towards women and their cries that created and sustained Women's Rights movements have now been diluted to a mere whimper. Is there any truth to this statement?

I want to use this article to examine what if any changes have happened since 1991 and how women's lives may or may not have changed.

Women have always been necessary to the workplace even if not respected for their contribution. Latent history informs us that due to the First World War (WW1) in 1914 -18, women were necessary to move out of the home where they worked to fulfill the employment gap due to men being at war. When the war ended, women did not naturally want to give up this level of financial independence and return to the home. Cross-referencing historical information, the fight for Women's Rights began much earlier therefore women were already aware of the injustices towards them thereby informing of the reluctance to 'return to the home.' In 1848, 68 women and 32 men outlined grievances towards women including women having the right to vote and signed a Declaration of Sentiments in New York. It was in 1872 that saw the national movement begin in the UK in the form of the National Society for Women's Suffrage and later the more influential National Union of Women's Suffrage Societies. Without this cross-referencing, one would be forgiven for mistaking that up until WW1 in 1914, women were not knowledgeable about their unjust treatment towards them.

With the knowledge that women did indeed know that they were being treated unfairly and that they actually felt strong enough to take action in different forms showed both tenacity and strength; words that were not used to describe women at all. Since 1991, what has changed to strengthen Women's Rights to being more equal to men?

Not much in my opinion from the viewpoint of entry-level top careers for women although according to a recent research carried out by Astbury Marsden, they found that this year has seen an increase of 100% of women in management positions. This equates to 12% overall from 6% overall last year. We should be grateful! What about the significant pay gaps between men and women for equal jobs? Well, according to Dr. Carla Harris from the Workplace Gender Equality Agency (WGEA), the gap is widening, currently for every dollar a man makes, his female counterpart earns 82 cents. I doubt very much that you will find a noticeable difference in the UK. In fact, upon research, women earned 15% less than men. Is this gap made worse in poor economic times?

So not much has changed in terms of respect for females and the contribution they make in society and for society. Not much in terms of how females are viewed, mostly negatively and for sexual pleasures. However what is more startling (perhaps an over-exaggeration) is that although there have always been women 'night-workers' (prostitutes), women appear to be engaging in their own war against themselves. Let me put this into perspective about this internal war going on with women. Notwithstanding the 'glamour' needed for night workers to attract for work, women are now using this same concept for approval from men and in the meantime waging an unsubstantiated war on their self-esteem. Not that those women did not care for their looks previously, as their grooming ritual is natural in attracting a mate. However, because of the Beauty Myth, the natural birthing process of grooming for a mate has become blurred, confusing and instills a lack of confidence in a female. The precocious instigation of the Beauty Myth undertaken by men but calculatingly not clearly defined (Naomi Wolf) has left women attempting to attain not just the indescribable but the unattainable as beauty is left open for interpretation by the beholder (men).

What has been the result?

Financial contributions to cosmetic, diet and surgery have all seen a surge in willing captors, all seeking this beauty myth and all rather quite despondent when they realise that the goalposts keeps shifting. Cosmetic companies revel in ascribing what their latest product is and how wonderfully powerful some ingredient is, now contained in their product. I mean, who on earth really heard of Pentapeptide, let alone researched what it did before buying the product?

Companies such as those in the cosmetic industry rely on the poor self-esteem of women to direct their products to. Women in return respond in an impassioned grab for the 'miracle' product that will stave off or at least slow down the ageing process. Women are made to feel that they no longer visually please and according to Wolf, companies can take steps in removing the female from her role in the workplace in favour of a younger model. Remember Miriam O'Reilly winning her claim against the BBC for what she alleges being dismissed on ageism and victimisation grounds? A second rate victory because she did not win on the grounds of sexism. What this tells me is what Wolf already identified in her book, that it is very difficult for a woman to claim against sex discrimination as the law fully supports what it calls a BFOQ (bone fide occupational qualification- USA) or the UK's version of GOQ (genuine occupational qualification- Wolf). What this means is that a company may dismiss a woman if they feel that she does not measure up to their ideology of beauty. Now remember, this level of beauty is not defined and what would this really say? As beauty is in the eye of the beholder (self) is it not?

The tribunal for Miriam O'Reilly was held on the 4-19th November 2010, 19 years after Wolf's publication therefore women are still demonstrably being targeted and treated according to how they look and not what talents they may have in the workplace. So no real progress here then!

Next time you go shopping, look out for the number of different beauty products. Be aware of the amount of time and energy that commercials use to sell you their copious amounts of products and the images they use. The use of anti-wrinkle creams on models probably not even yet 20 years old yet. Why on earth they need anti-wrinkle cream is beyond me. Next, these kinds of adverts will be shown using a 13 year old!

Now look at grounded products such as lipsticks. Now you can get ones that last all day. In fact, you need another product to get the lipstick off because normal cleanser and water does not always work. Companies have to keep re-inventing the wheel to keep their profits up so their imagination runs riot and comes up with all sorts of products all doing the same thing but differently. Women fall for this; just take a look at her make up bag, products of the same but different thing, hardly used due to the copious amounts.

What about products containing a certain ingredient that will 'benefit' perceived 'bags' under the eyes. Do you really think that by buying this product will alleviate 'baggy eyes'? Why should it, because if it did then you would have to stop buying the product once you have been cured? So companies use only enough to make a slight difference and you have to keep re-buying to secure better results. I imagine companies laughing at women as they stand far at the side of the room throwing in the magic ingredient (that is to say how offensively low the ingredient is in terms of weight and productivity). Now, I am not saying that a particular ingredient does not work, for example caffeine. However, following your lovely cup of tea, you could quite easily reconstitute the teabag and put this on your eyes. Probably has more caffeine in the teabag than in the expensive product you buy.

Let us look at how other companies have cashed in on the creation of poor self-esteem in women. An ostentatious amount of money is spent by females on diet products in the hope that the 'extra' pounds they think they are carrying will disappear leaving the female with a sense of acceptance and perceived beauty. The sugars used in many foods are replaced with a substitute that is less calorific. To me, this is just a lot of useless chemicals being pumped in the body and for no real gain. Processed sugars are not good for anyone in huge amounts and a wise thing for health purposes would be to reduce your intake not substitute this with something that requires the body to work harder to break it down if it is able to use at all.

For research purposes, I typed in 'what effect does artificial sugars have on the body?' and I did not have to look far to clearly see the dangers of artificial sweeteners. According to author Marcelle Pick, (Obstetrician and Gynecologist) she speaks openly about being properly informed of possible side effects of sweeteners. I will not mention the company as I do not wish to give them any form of exposure but you can do your own research. This particular name brand is the trade name for Sucralose; a synthetic compound stumbled upon in 1976 by scientists in Britain seeking a new pesticide formation. (Marcelle Pick) What this company did was twist the sugar component of their product by citing the 'natural sugar' aspect. Yet more importantly, did you catch the word 'pesticide?'

Now we go onto cosmetic surgery. This phenomenon has increased tenfold since the 1970's. Now you can book a botox in your lunch hour and be back to work. The lackadaisical procedure should be seen as worrying and not that companies are seeking to make life easier for women to attain this face stiffening procedure. Remember the poor actress infamously known for her 'trout pout?' I will leave this here to save her blushes! The point I am making is some of these procedures are downright dangerous yet women are still clambering to risk life or limb.

We do not have to search our brains too hard to recall some other poor soul who underwent breast surgery to enlarge her already natural assets and perceptually ended up looking misplaced. The female body is perfect as it stands and whilst some females may have to undergo a surgical procedure on medical grounds, this should not be confused with the female body, being nature at its finest.

Women are undergoing all sorts of procedures in an attempt to gain the unattainable body. Bum enhancements, face lifts, eye lifts, neck lifts (anything that is deemed lift-up-able), nose adjustments, liposuction on any part of the body and do not get me started with lace fronted weaves or extensions. The woman spends a great deal of time and money on products and services to achieve the ideology of beauty and remember this perceived beauty is undefined. So what this means, is they end up chasing a mirage that disintegrates the moment they think that they are now acceptable. This results in a cyclical pattern in women dabbling in metamorphosis, re-inventing something else to feed that ever-growing pit in lost souls leading to other behavioural and emotional difficulties.

If you look at the objective of The Beauty Myth, the power is monumental and the devastation that this myth leaves behind is great news for those instigating this concept for nothing more than mind-control over women. This concept reminds me of the Lynch (Willie Lynch) method; create a divide and rule mask, in this case, in women.

Choosing the Ideal Wedding Shoes

The selection of bridal shoes may not be on the top of your list of priorities when it comes to planning your big day. However, it is absolutely essential to spend time searching for a comfortable pair that also complements your gown. You'll find your chosen wedding dress designers will most likely be more than happy to provide some recommendations and these tips below might also help.

Select a Fabric

Many wedding dress designers will advise you to choose shoes made from raw silk or satin. That's because these same materials are likely to be used in the creation of your gown. However, you might also think about buying shoes made from crepe or matt satin as a suitable choice. A contrast such as this can also act as a feature of the outfit.

Consider the Colour

Those who take the traditional approach will undoubtedly be keen to find shoes in the same colour as the bridal gown. However, if you find the perfect pair in a contrasting colour, you might choose to have them dyed to match. You can even choose silver or gold shoes to match your accessories.

Opt for Comfort Over Style

You might well have set your heart on a pair of sleek and stylish high-heeled shoes. However, it would be sensible to try them out first so you are assured of being comfortable on your big day. If you're really worried about the prospect of ending up as a princess with blisters, it may be advisable to make a more conservative choice. You might enjoy ultimate comfort in a pair of satin slippers, or even a pair of exquisitely decorated flip-flops for a beach ceremony.

Think About the Weather

If you're planning a winter wedding you'll need to choose the footwear accordingly. Even if you opt for style over warmth for the ceremony, a pair of fake fur boots can see you through the rest of the reception if needs be - and add to the fairy-tale of a winter wedding. Alternatively for a midsummer wedding you might choose a pair of sparkly sandals or flip flops as mentioned above. Most wedding dress designers will be able to provide information about the seasonal trends.

Find Shoes to Suit Your Budget

It's worth bearing in mind there is a great deal of variation in the price of bridal shoes. It might be possible to find a discounted pair at the local shoe sellers, or alternatively you could head online and search for a pair of luxury Swarovski crystal encrusted shoes. You may even choose to enlist the help of wedding dress designers for a custom made pair.

Saturday, October 19, 2013

Ten Points to Ponder (and Ten Things I Love) About Einstein

Einstein didn't wear socks. When he was young, he found out that the big toe always ended up making a hole in the sock. He was keenly aware that we are easily conditioned by what others do and say and he refused to let that happen. When he learned that his big toe always made a hole in his socks, he stopped wearing them.

Einstein used intuition to help him discover new things. He often felt he was right before he knew he was right. When he had a feeling about something, he listened to the feeling. Then he went looking for evidence to prove the feeling.

Einstein had a thinking chair. He spent time sitting in it when he needed to solve a problem.

Einstein rarely thought in words. He understood the power of imagination so he would daydream and use his imagination when he needed to solve a problem. When a thought or idea floated in, he'd feel it or see it and then try to express it in words afterward.

Einstein did not believe he possessed any special talents. He said he was only passionately curious. He believed we are all born into a great Mystery and he said we should stand like curious children before it.

Einstein was often so engrossed in his work that he forgot to eat lunch. He didn't notice time passing because he was connected to his deepest passion and creative source. Einstein believed the development of our creative powers is a person's most valuable asset in life

Einstein was convinced that a force or a spirit is manifest in the laws of the universe, a spirit that is vastly superior to us humans and that is beyond anything we can comprehend. He said that when we try to penetrate the secrets of nature with our limited means, we find something subtle, intangible, and inexplicable.

Einstein knew that death is not an end. He believed we live on in our children and in the younger generation. He said that our children are us, and that our bodies are like "wilted leaves on the tree of life." He understood that our existence on earth is fleeting. He described our existence like a brief visit in a strange house.

Einstein knew that a human being is part of a whole but as humans, we experience ourselves, our thoughts and our feelings as something separate from the rest. He called this separation an "optical delusion." He said we aren't really separate at all.

Einstein believed that when a whole group of individuals becomes a "we," they collectively reach as high as human beings can reach. He believed that a sense of responsibility toward others is more important than power, success, fame and honour. He saw service to the community as one of life's highest achievements. He knew that the fate of the human race depends upon the moral strength of human beings and he believed it's our sacred human responsibility to be the best we can be.

Are you being the best you can be?

Buying Jewellery to Suit the Personality of the Wearer

Women simply love jewellery. In fact, they find it irresistible and they often feel incomplete without wearing a piece of it. It adds to their personality, especially when appearing in social gatherings, though it frequently forms a part of their work look too. It makes their day somewhat special.

No gift is as precious as a piece of beautiful jewellery. Nonetheless, no jewellery item is suitable to be worn by almost everyone. Since each woman has its own personality, the difference in taste varies widely. When getting something not to her liking, any woman would start wondering if you really know her well enough. Of course, the thought matters the most. She will welcome jewellery as a gift, but if you fail to judge her taste, she'll wear that piece only to keep you in good humor and in worst cases it'll get dumped in her drawer for good, leaving her wondering what prompted you to procure it for her.

Fortunately, there are ways to save you from such an embarrassment. You need to learn how to distinguish between different types of 'jewellery' personalities. Here's your guide in that direction and effort:

Primarily, there are six kinds of jewellery personalities:

1. The trend setter: This personality is an extrovert. Without exerting any effort, she remains stylish, forthright and confident. Clearly, they are attention grabbers and love that style of jewellery which gets noticed easily. She knows to carry it in such manner that others are immediately prompted to copy her looks. Old fashioned or even the current styles are not for such personalities. You best bet is to have a close look at her to notice that element of exclusiveness in what she is wearing. Consider yourself lucky if you can find some piece with unique style at one of the stores selling the latest styles.

2. The fashionista: This kind of personality may be a bit lagging behind the trend setter, but it is certainly confident and well-informed on the current trends. She patronizes designer stuff. Her wardrobe is often flooded with out-of-fashion jewelry and clothes from the last season, though some may be donating such old stuff regularly to make room for latest pieces in their wardrobe. Buying jewellery for such women is not all that difficult. You just need to be aware of the current trends. With so many fashion magazines around, it shouldn't be difficult to know that, else watch what most women are wearing these days.

3. The chameleon: She is not so easily spotted as the fashionsta. She is smart and decides which of the ongoing trends would suit her the most. A characteristic feature of such women is that they like a variety of designs and they know well how to mix and match them depending on her mood or occasion. She doesn't discard things easily, as she is talented enough to realize which item would go exceedingly well with her other dresses to give her altogether different looks. That makes things rather easy for you. Just think of an appropriate occasion when she could use it or match it with some of her other possessions. For example, consider something colorful for summers, plain and convenient for the day and glamorous for nights.

4. The conservative: Since she values traditions, her style is traditional. As the definition suggest, conservatives don't follow the latest trends. Moreover, they value and prefer quality to quantity. Unlike the other personalities described above, she loves having a small collection of costly pieces of jewellery. Well, if you have a fat wallet, it's not difficult to please a conservative, just buy her something in gold or silver in traditional designs.

5. The Girl-Next-Door: She personifies modesty. She is very forthcoming and natural. She has her personal style and wouldn't let go of that. When selecting jewellery for such a personality, do keep in mind her personal style and look for something that reflects feminism. You should understand if she prefers short or long necklaces, butterflies or heart shapes, and the colors she loves. For instance, if she is fond of earthy items, think on the lines of buying her some pieces of jewellery crafted from wood.

6. The Tomboy: Wearing jewellery is not part of her personality. Tomboy is characteristically fun-loving, easy-going and generally a good sport. She doesn't like investing too much of her time in her appearance, being practical is more of her style. She won't make much fuss while dressing up for any special occasion. When buying jewellery for a tomboy, you would do well to avoid explicitly feminine designs. Look for bracelets, necklaces and earring in practical designs. It will help if you take notice of her present collection of jewellery to assess her preference for colors and designs.

Having understood her type of jewelry personality, you can make a better guess of the kind of designs she would love and what you should avoid. If you are still unsure, you can seek help from some of her friends or relations to narrow down the gap.

However, it's not only the piece of jewellery that matters. What matters too is the environment where you give it to her and the emotion associated with it. Take her out to one of her favorite spots, or create a romantic evening that she would love. Let everything be perfect for she will be reminiscent of this piece of excellent jewelry forever. Unfortunately, if anything unexpected happens, preserve that piece for more opportune time. She would have still enjoyed spending that special time with you. Hopefully, everything would go exceedingly well, keeping you both happy, offering you the best opportunity to present that precious piece you so lovingly bought for her.

Friday, October 18, 2013

Honoring the Divine Mother: The Feminine Energy of God

Recently, I have noticed a new openness to the loving feminine energy of God. I'm not talking here about the feminist movement. I'm referring to something much deeper than that. I'm talking about the spiritual energy of the Divine Mother.

What is the Divine Feminine Energy? There are many explanations of it, but I like to keep things simple. I define it as the all encompassing love of a Divine Mother who never turns away from her children. If we choose to yield to the love of the Divine Mother, gone are the old teachings that we are bad, born with defects, sins, etc., and that we must repent in order for God to love us. We can imagine the loving care of a mother who will never turn away from her child, even when that child does things that may be inappropriate or unacceptable.

The Divine Mother is always there with open arms. All she wants us to do is love our selves, because when love is present we are connected to the Divine energy.

The love of self that I speak of is not a selfish or egoistic love. I am talking about LOVE: a spiritual energy; a force that goes beyond the boundaries of relativity and materialism.

A wonderful way to practice the Divine Feminine energy in our lives today is to (re)connect to our hearts. We must work to let go of past hurts and resentments. These feelings only block the light of the Feminine Energy from entering our hearts. When we look at others, we must try to remember who they really are, regardless of their dress, color, body art or disposition. They are our brothers and sisters. They are children of God, just as we are. Smile at them. I have a name for the practice of smiling at those I encounter in public. I call it "face yoga."

During my workshops, I have helped people from all walks of life; people who are carrying heavy baggage - addictions, dysfunctional relationships, death of a loved one, emotional, sexual or physical abuse - to tap into their Divine Feminine energy to reroute, rewire and reconnect to their hearts.

Another way to connect or reconnect to our hearts is "being in the silence." Being in the silence is all about practicing silent meditation even when in the midst of the intense activity of everyday life. It is the Mystical Feminine principle of "relaxing and releasing" tension, in contrast to the masculine principle of "striving to attain." The "silence" brings us to the conscious awareness of who we truly are - unique individual aspects of Divinity itself. It is the evolutionary expansion of our identity introducing us to the Inner State of Grace, which is the home and source of all Love, Peace, Joy and Wisdom.

Sidebar: Who is Our Divine Mother?

As with God, there are many names, but there is only one Divine Feminine Energy. To the pagans it is Mother Earth; to the Christians it is Mother Mary. In Judaism it is Asherah; to the Buddhist it is Kwan Yin and/or the Green Tara. In Hinduism, the Divine Feminine has many names, including Durga, Lakshmi, Saraswati, Parvati, Radha and Sita. The Egyptians had Isis; the Greeks had Persephone; and the list goes on and on.

And there are the more recent female saints and avatars who have blessed us, such as Mother Frances Cabrini (1850-1917). She is credited with many miracles while she was on the earth and, even after her passing, miracles were attributed to her. Then there was Therese Neumann (1898-1962), a Catholic mystic, stigmatist and miracle women from Germany, who transformed her remarkable sufferings into means of helping and healing others.

Mother Maria Skobtsova (1891-1945), a Russian socialist intellectual who later sacrificed herself to help Russians and Jews in Paris during the 1930s and 1940s, courageously died a martyr's death in the Nazi concentration camps on behalf of her fellow inmates. Hazrat Babajan was an Afghani Muslim princess in her youth, but left home to trek into India where she studied from Muslim and Hindu teachers. She lived in solitude and later gained renown as a Sufi sage and enigmatic wonder-worker of tremendous blessing force. When she died in 1931, she was alleged to be 130 or even 140 years old.

Anandamayi Ma (1892-1982), known as the "Blissful Mother" and guru to gurus, was an illustrious mystic and sage who was hailed as a Divine Incarnation. Her mother had a number of auspicious dreams of gods and goddesses before Ma's birth; a sign usually indicating the presence of an imminent mahatma (Great Soul). The infant Ma did not cry at birth and throughout her childhood was remarkably serene. It is said that nobody could fail to understand her, for she addressed herself to all as if they were at the same level as children of God.

Mother Teresa (1910-1997 was born in Albania and raised as a Roman Catholic. She loved hearing stories of missionaries early in life. At the age of 18, she left home to join the Sisters of Loreto. She eventually left her convent to wander and help the poor and sick on her own, with God's help alone. In 1950, she was given permission to start the Missionaries of Charity. Its mission was to care for, "... all those people who feel unwanted, unloved, uncared for throughout society, people that have become a burden to the society and are shunned by everyone." She won many humanitarian awards, but most important she was able to give dignity to the helpless, poor, sick and dying.

Anasuya Devi (1923-1985) was God-realized from birth. She later married, raised a family and founded a large spiritual community in South India. Celebrated as "Mother of all," her remarkable teachings uphold the Supreme Power of God and the "original innocence" of all beings. Syama Mataji (b.1916) fully realized God in a short, but wonderful time by simply chanting/focusing her entire being on the Divine Names of God (Hare Krishna, Hare Krishna, Krishna, Krishna, Hare, Hare, Hare Rama, Hare Rama, Rama, Rama, Hare, Hare). Awesome miracles and exquisite songs of devotion have emanated from her ever since then.

And then there is Amma Mata Amritanandamayi (b.1953) esteemed as another stupendous Incarnation of the Divine Mother. Today, she is India's leading female light, with a mission growing by leaps and bounds. She selflessly travels the world to console, hug, heal and inspire millions of children with the power of Divine Love. She is also known as the "Hugging Mother."

It is not a coincidence that these blessed women came to us within the last two centuries. After two centuries of banishing the feminine energy, I believe that these women came forth to usher in a new age of the Divine Feminine Energy.

Special Cups To Detect Date Rape Drugs

I have heard about this company called Drink Savvy located in Boston who has created special cups and straws to detect date rape drugs. I think this is a great idea and maybe it will help prevent some innocent woman from being victimized. This topic hits close to home since I possibly was the victim of date rape from a guy I used to see. On two occasions he told me we had sex but I wasn't aware of it nor did I remember it, see it, feel it or hear it. Although he never said what really happened, chances are he slipped something in my cup because the last thing I remember was him being on top of me in the bed. The following day I awoke in pain from what felt like a brutal sexual experience. The same incident happened a few nights later. I never knew what happened to me those two nights but I believe I was date raped.

Having these cups available for women is necessary because these drugs are circulating on the streets and easily obtained. The cup is able to detect three different date rape chemicals. The cup made of plastic will change color if GHB, Ketamine or rohypnol which are popular date rape drugs come in contact with the cup. These drugs are popular because of their sedative effects on a person.

GHB is a general anesthetic used to treat insomnia, narcolepsy, and other disorders and is a central nervous system depressant used as a downer or reduces excitability. On the streets it's known as liquid ecstasy, juice, lollipops, Georgia home boy and many other names. It causes euphoria and enhanced sensuality and at high levels can cause unconsciousness or death. Ketamine is a general anesthesia used in human and veterinary medicine and can cause high blood pressure and hallucinations. It is also used to treat people with depression or bipolar disorder. Rohypnol or better known as roofies is known to induce amnesia in patients and is often used in date rape situations since the victim will have no recollection of the sexual assault.

The creator of the cups and straws in fact was a victim of being drugged and wanted to prevent this from happening to someone else. If there are no drugs present in the cup it will remain clear but if drugs are present in your drink red strips will appear around the cup. The straw works the same way. The cups will be available to the public early to mid 2014.